Phil’s Hobo Humor and Insights

Hobo humor, funny stories, and maybe something useful too.



Office Hobo - Mean Old Blackbeard

December 1st, 2006 by Phil Stewart

I got really mean and wicked bad today. It was after drinking a couple shots of sauce packets and gunpowder, which is something I do when I have to get mean and wicked bad. Almost like I was mean old Blackbeard, except I have a typewriter and like to print unmentionables. Boy do those sauce packets go good with some gunpowder.

After getting some patented go sauce and doing some mad calculations on my typewriter, I went looking for more work to do. I gotta keep busy, and sauce packets keep me busy. Nacho Cheese and Salsa Factories keep me busy too, but I can't be busy for one of those right now. Mainly because I have busy sauce packet stuff to do.

I sure have been accomplishing a lot at work lately. They moved me under a new stairwell, which is good. This one has less traffic. There is one stinky guy that passes by though. He squeaks when he walks and I think he might be after my sauce packets. But I don't think I have much to worry about because my mutant goldfish is guarding them. Don't tell anyone.

What a good day!

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