March 15th, 2009 by 
Phil Stewart
I just found out about Carl Reiner's new book, "Novel Beginnings" and I've gotta say this is one of the coolest book ideas to come around in a long time. The title is clever as well, let me explain...
The book contains the beginning of twenty-seven separate novels with the idea that whoever wants to can take each story and turn it into a full-fledged book. You finish the story, send it back to the publisher, and then cross your fingers for a shot at $25,000 in cold hard cash, a wicked bad publishing contract, and a book with your name on it. Oh, and they're putting Carl Reiner's name on there too, if that matters to you or anything.
I think it's very cool that someone like Carl Reiner is putting out an open call for co-authors and this is a nifty way to do it. Sure, maybe it's just another ploy to sell dead trees but it's nice to see someone engage their readers like this. The book is scheduled for release in June 2009 but can be pre-ordered on Amazon now
Book Details
- Novel Beginnings by Carl Reiner
- Hardcover
- Publisher: Phoenix Books (June 1, 2009)
- Language: English
- ISBN-10: 1597776289
- ISBN-13: 978-1597776288
As a side note, when I started writing this post, Novel Beginnings had an Amazon sales rank around #17,000 and the sales rank now stands at #8,378. I guess the orders are pouring in for the book, showing there are tons of aspiring authors out there. It'll be interesting to see how many copies of Carl's book sell versus how many completed novels are actually submitted to the publisher. My guess... purple banana.
If you can't wait until June for Carl's book to come out, here's a beginning to a Stinky Hobo story you can finish. Feel free to post your ending in the comments section. If anyone actually wastes their time doing this, I just might post it on the main page.
Stinky Hobo Beginnings
This morning I woke up taped to the soda machine again. It was like the first time, only they used more tape this time and I think my belly button is stuck. At least the warm fuzzies are still here. I'm not sure what happened last night and am not really sure where I am right now. I'd ask the dead dog but he's passed out in the bathroom in an ungodly taco mess. This is gonna be a long day.
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It only takes a moment to rip my belly from off the tape sticking it to the machine. Then I feel something in my stomach. Sometimes there are good feelings, sometimes there are taco feelings, but this is definitely a bad feeling of the bad kind. Not a taco feeling at all!
I ignore the feeling and remove myself from the machine. All the while I call out for dead dog to come and catch me.
He doesn’t catch me at all, and I fall on my butt, and that bad bad feeling starts again in my stomach.
Then I see it. My belly button is still stuck to the tape on the candy machine.
I check out my belly and feel the hole there. Yup. My belly button’s gone. I wonder if it will heal?
I stumble to the bathroom, holding my belly, hoping to keep it in, hoping against hope that dead dog will let me use his second navel to fill the hole in my stomach.
But dead dog is completely passed out. I try to steal his second navel, and that’s when he wakes up and tries to nip at my hand.
What am I going to do? I run back to the candy machine and rip the offending tape off. There in my hand, I hold the tape and my belly button.
I look down at the hole in my belly and wonder why there is no blood.
Then I realize it as my vision clears. What I thought was my belly button was actually the jelly bean I keep in my belly button in case of emergencies.
The hole in my belly isn’t a hole at all, it’s just the same old belly button!
“I didn’t recognize you without the jelly bean!” I say, patting my belly button. “I’ll never mistake you for a gut wound ever again!”
Silly morning eyes. I should’ve remembered that I don’t see well right after I wake up. I am relieved that I am not dying. I am relieved that I didn’t borrow the dead dog’s second belly button (he was still mad at me after that one time, and stealing his belly button wouldn’t have been the best way at making it up to him.)
I shake my head and pop the jelly bean into my mouth. It tastes a little like lint and is slightly stale.
“Hello, breakfast,” I say while chewing. “It’s going to be a good day.” And maybe a long day too.